Sometimes it is hard to "mother".

We have all had our day's as mother's where you JUST CAN'T! And of course some feel guilty about feeling this way or thinking this way, so leave it up to me to tell you, "you are not alone"! 

Recently the love of my life, the fuel to my soul, the mint to my chocolate chips has been a little mouthy. More then usual. Homie acts like he can talk to me like a damn 18 year old talking to his friend's! I have tried to talk to him, yell at him, take shit away, spank his nalgas with a chancla, but to no avail, my NicholasG gives no fucks! 

Yesterday was a hard one for me. He just kept whining and making dog noises and growling. Like being weird and random as fuck. Yes I know what you are saying if you personally know me, "he is just like you Steph". YES but modified to like 100! So anyway, I had had enough! I was at witt's end and after I raised my voice to a level psycho, I told him, "I need to walk away from you for a bit" and I did. I locked myself in my bathroom and took a few deep breaths. I even sagged myself to try to calm the fuck down. I didn't want to spank him or even acknowledge his behavior further. I texted some of my closets girlfriends to assist me and also spoke to Pancha. She has 2 boys and she has known NicholasG his entire life. So she calmed me down and told me to ignore it, stop yelling and just let it go. So anyway, I come out of the restroom after psycho level went down to stressed out mom level and this little nugget is cleaning his room, picking up all his clothes, hanging everything up, arraigning his shoes! Hijo de su chingada madre!!! He totally knew how to smooth things over with me. He knew that he fucked up and how I hate seeing his room messy, so he did what he knew best: Make Mom happy again! And I couldn't help but be grateful for him understanding. So he gets to bed, no big deal. I waited until this morning to calmly talk to him. I told him how we are not even promised the next 5 mins of our lives! How we need to be kind with each other and the one person he needs to respect the most is his mother! I kissed his stinky head, wished him an amazing day, rubbed some essential oils on him and told him I would see him later.

See, we are allowed to lose our shit every now and then. And it is perfectly OK! No one is perfect. You are not perfect! Stop trying to follow these charts about development and behavior and what is right for their age. Cause I am telling you right fucking now, EVERY KID IS DIFFERENT!!! Every single 8 year old is differnet from the next. We gotta stop stressing about our kids being perfect. I need to tell myself this every single day. Not every kids makes up Michael Jackson outfits out of his closet clothes. They are all special little shits and all we gotta do is love them, accept them and learn from them.