Parenting. The easiest thing in the world! Ha!!

Ok, so let me start off by saying I love my son with all my heart and soul. I would kill, die, steal, fight, do anything and everything for my child. Had to throw that out there for all you psychos that will probably put in your two cents about this blog. Ok, so growing up I always said I wanted 4 kids. I always saw myself having a huge family and doing lots of family things like trips, parties, the beach. Everything. Then as I got older, reality struck :-) First came along my stepson JR. We got him when he was 8. Boy was that a reality check. It's hard to play the "mom" roll when you have no right. It was tough getting used to a kid. Not a baby and not yet a teenager. He was in that middle phase where he was still kinda spoiled but then was "too cool" for certain things. We all adjusted well for the most part. He's actually a good kid. Now he's a teenager and a smart ass and tends to talk back but what 14 year old doesn't right. The only difference is, I used to get my ass beat the minute I even rolled my eyes at my mom. Let's just say JR never has! Then, the little monster was born. My biological son El Flaco! This little boy has given me trouble since before he was born. At 5 months old I was put on bed rest cause of my high blood pressure and stress. I was swollen like an elephant! It was horrible. I had to see a specialist 2x a week and finally had to have him at 7.5 months cause my body was all in shock and shit. He was born skinny but healthy so he stayed hospitalized for 14 days to get his weight up. Now, for those that actually physically know my child you know he's a special little boy LOL! He is a chion man! Not a day has gone by since the day that he's been born that he doesn't cry. NOT ONE SINGLE DAY! He is "that kid" that throws himself on the floor, that screams at the store at the top of his lungs, that just whines and whines (like he is RIGHT NOW) and no matter what we say or do, it doesn't stop. Ever. Trust me, I've tried IT ALL. I've never whooped the shit out of my kid but he's gotten his spankings, the time outs, the toys taken away, no TV or movies. NOTHING works!!! I find it fucken hilarious when I see all these moms, family and friends that say "my sleepless nights are worth it" or "I can stare at my son/daughter all day", "my child can do no wrong". PLEASE! haha! Every baby/child is different and I know all moms have wanted to rip their fucken hair out and scream "shut the fuck up" to their crying child. To that I say IT'S OK!! It's ok to feel frustrated and ok that your baby is not perfect. It's ok to want to take a walk alone sometimes. It's normal people. Stop faking the funk and making it seem like parenting is the best thing in the world. It's not. Sorry, MY very own personal opinion. Wanna know how I calm down? When I think of my family and friends that have lost their babies or have babies with special needs. I tell myself "wow, they don't have this opportunity to see their kids go to daycare and to make friends at the park". That's how I chill the fuck up. Seriously. You are not a bad person cause your kid gets  on your nerves from time to time. It's normal. Just like our significant others get on our nerves, or our siblings, co-workers, friends, relatives. It's a normal emotion. Now, my son can sometimes be a good kid. That's usually around 9:30 p.m. when he's getting ready for bed and sits still for me to read him a book and he hugs me very tight and tells me "te quiero mucho duerme con los angelitos". It's at that moment when I stop and take a deep breath and I think to myself, "damn I love this kid". But then reality hits again nightly between 12-2 a.m. when he's trying to sneak into our bed! And we say no and he runs screaming and crying back to his room slamming his door! LOL! Sorry but I don't enjoy my "sleepless nights". I need my mother effin' sleep!! I love my kid and I wouldn't change my situation for the world. I wouldn't turn back time and NOT have him. He came to me for a purpose. But he's also made me realize that I truly never, ever, ever, ever want more kids, ever again! haha! I love El Flaco, but he's 4 kids in one ;-)